S5E14: What To Do When Progress Stalls
If I reminded you that you are perfect, would you argue me down or step into your perfection? Welcome to perfect. Welcome to perfect. Welcome to perfect. Where there are no excuses, no expectations, and we explore the world without limitations.
JClay:I'm J Clay, rapper, spiritual teacher, with my co host Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor. Let's be real, so let's be perfect.
JClay:Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Yo.
Troy Washington:What up? What up? Welcome to perfect mode. And first off, let me start by telling y'all that we love y'all. We're waiting for the opportunity to be anywhere, sharing our thoughts, hopefully, and helping you realize that you are perfect.
Troy Washington:And the reason why I can say that unapologetically is because I know that you are one of 1 numero uno. You cannot be duplicated, replicated. And the only reason and I mean, the only reason you would think otherwise is if you're looking at this person next to you and saying, I'm not them. But guess what? You are you, and that's all you need.
Troy Washington:And, of course, it's yours truly, Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor. And I have my boy, Jay Clay, spiritual rapper and teacher, and we're about to get on here and tell you what to do when progress stalls, what to do when progress stalls. What up, Jay?
JClay:Yo. Yo. What up? What up? Happy Sunday.
JClay:Happy perfect Sunday to all my perfect people in perfect land, doing the perfect things at the perfect place at the perfect time. It's all perfect. And, yeah, man, I'm I'm feeling good. I'm eager to talk about this because I actually experienced this this week, and it was it was it was eye opening in many ways. And, yeah, as always, we we need to to flesh it out.
Troy Washington:So so I guess to actually get this started, I'm interested in your experience, and then I'll tell you about me having some style out times as well. But I wanna start with where where where you are and how what's styled out and how did you overcome it.
JClay:Yeah. So okay, so the the the interesting thing about about this is last Sunday, I don't I think I might have mentioned it. Oh, yeah. I had, like, the best basketball game, I've had in in a long time. But the second to last play, like, I kinda tweaked my back.
JClay:It was just like everything shifted down. I was like, that's that's weird, but I'm standing straight up, so I'm good. And then I, you know, went about my day. I wouldn't play pickleball for the first time later, so more physical activity. But then at that night, oh, I was I was, I don't know.
JClay:It it was just I was locked up a bit. And then so, like, the whole week, it's like the soreness has been shifting. So it's it's it's getting better. It's it's shifting, but that stopped the progress of, like, the physical activities that I've been doing and that I want to continue doing the things I wanna progress in progress in. And it was just like, that's just kinda stalled out.
JClay:But at the same time because I'm I'm like, I'm in this gidded energy right now. Like, I have this wave of energy. I can't tell you where it came from, but how I am when I have certain good creative energy, I just I ride that wave. So it was kinda disappointing in that, but that same energy was directed at other things that needed to be taken care of. And I and I've been getting stuff done like I've never gotten done before.
JClay:And so that's just a mild example. Like, I've had deeper examples of this, but it was it was a shifting. It was like, okay, I can't do this now for this goal or for these goals. What else can I do, if anything?
Troy Washington:Okay. So a couple things here. And, so number 1, I appreciate your approach to that, Mud, because your approach is always an ideal approach for anybody, for all of us. The thing that comes to my mind that I wanna, I guess, tell our audience first is that you never stop being your creator. That's the beautiful part about us being the gift.
Troy Washington:You know what I'm saying? You you never stop being your creator. And the reason why I bring that up is that when we're going through this this thing called life and we're trying all these different things, and then you actually get to that point, I e, the the the incident with your, with your with your injury order with me. Just the yesterday, I was standing at I was at a basketball tournament with my kids, and I don't even know how it happened, but I kinda hyperextended my knee, kinda bent back just a little bit. And, you know, I I number 1, my progress didn't stall that day.
Troy Washington:And the reason why is because I had purpose for being there. My purpose was being there with supporting my kid, making sure that I cheer for him, make sure I record the game like I generally do. But then when I got home, then I don't have that same motivation. And so things that I could want to do or things that I would think that are important to do, I can just say, you know what? I don't wanna deal with that right now because my leg hurt.
Troy Washington:Even so much so, you can come until today. Before we get on the show, we were I don't wanna say we were behind because we're always on time, but I wasn't moving at the pace that I normally would move at in a day before a show because my leg was not feeling the way that I feel like it's supposed to be feeling. But, I had a purpose, which is the reason why I'm here. Right? But, I I guess the big part of it is last night, whenever I felt like the things that I should have been doing, I didn't do.
Troy Washington:I gave my sec self a second to realize, well, I'm a creator. What else can I do
JClay:Yeah?
Troy Washington:In the position that I'm in? And I think that's key when it comes to, you know, what to do when when progress starts is remembering that you're creative. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And I and and and now that now that you said that, I'm remembering more about the story. Like, the day after, I was I was hurt. Not hurt, like, my back was hurt, but hurt, like, mentally. Like, man, I I was ready to just, you know, do what I was ready to do.
JClay:So it's a little bit of sadness. So, I was like, man, you know what? I'm about to I'm about to just eat me a big breakfast and then just go about my business. And so I ate a big big old breakfast, so stuff that I wouldn't normally eat. That's, I mean, still healthy, but just not that that what I would normally eat or whatever.
JClay:And I felt good. I was I was happy I did that. And that then I I was able to relook at things from a place of acceptance. Like, okay. This is the situation.
JClay:This is the truth right now. I could probably still do stuff and aggravate this more, or I can take this time to heal because I haven't really rested in a while anyway. And then I can just focus on these other things. And that, like, that that acceptance was key because when I tell you I, like, I I I kinda wanna say I had a perfect week by my standards. Like, you know how you you have things you just wanna make sure you hit or just milestones and just certain things, and it even added to extra habits that I didn't even know needed.
JClay:Like, I I I told you separately. I was like, man, I finally imposed a limit on my phone for, like, social media, and I stuck to it. Like, I didn't hit ignore. And it it was funny. Like, even with that, I had to pivot because there are so many times I just instinctively opened a social media app Even right after closing it, reopening it again, I'm like, no.
JClay:No. No. No. But I was creative in so many other ways and and just took care of stuff. So it was cool.
Troy Washington:And so so so so two things here. Side note, I hate when I do that, FYI. Like, whenever I impose those limits on myself, the the thing that comes to my mind more often than not when this happens is the fact that I would get on my phone and open up an app. Not that I just closed it, but I will open up a app at a routine. And I I absolutely be like, why did I just do that?
Troy Washington:And I'll even change the screen and try to go and pick what I'm looking, but I will still open up the same app just out of routine, out of habit. So that's that's neither here nor there. I just have to say that because of what you said. So you you're not alone. But the other part to this is the part that I think that we have to get to is realizing that roadblocks are purposeful all the time.
Troy Washington:Like, again, I'm telling you to remember that we are creators at all times, but Roblox are purposeful at all times because I think it's a draw for you to go and dig into your creativity. You never heard a person that created a business that didn't hit a Roblox and then figure out a way to pivot around that. And and a lot of times, they created a a better or faster pathway or made their business better. And and especially for myself, funding up, I I deal with progression stalls all the time. I'm a real estate broker.
Troy Washington:I'm a realtor. Right? And so, you know, in real estate, a lot of times, you you you catch waves. There are certain times when people want to sell houses, and there are some times where it's not that they don't wanna sell houses, but they're they have a hesitancy because they they realize that there's a market shift at certain times of the year. So there is always this period where that feels like progress stalls for me.
Troy Washington:And so what ends up happening is I go through a a a state where I'm like, dang, I don't know what to do. I don't know how I'm gonna do this. And then all of a sudden, their roadblock starts to kick into action, my creativity that was always there, but I never gave it the proper acknowledgment for me to utilize it. So what you'll see is, okay, well, I start doing a string of videos, or I start talking to my team, or I start reading more articles. And what's happening in that is I'm bringing more to my world, not that I need more, but the inspiration for me to be able to create more business.
Troy Washington:And that's how, you know, any entrepreneurial job works. And, I mean, I I just think that's kinda how it goes for everything. But, again, just being able to tap in and realize that, okay, this roadblock was here for me to utilize other skills that I have. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and even, and it even led to more fun in other ways. Like, it wasn't even always about work with these with these roadblocks. But one interesting addition was, I I had the idea, like, the the time that I would normally go to taekwondo class or whatever. I was like, well, I can't go.
JClay:I'm I'm a make dinner. So I didn't want to watch, like streaming while I did it. I imposed that limit to, and I was like, man, what can I do? Oh, I want to listen to music, but without lyrics. I just want to listen to music.
JClay:And I hope I heard something about, like, certain classical pieces. They can raise your vibration. So I'm I've never just played classical music. I'm playing classical music. It's changing the way I'm like cutting the vegetables.
JClay:It's like, you know, you see the movies where it just like it just changed the right, the whole world. So I was like, man, I'm I'm I'm I'm a go with this. So I, I sat at the table, I opened my window, and I was still listening to classical music, just eating, looking at nature, and it just changed the vibe of everything. I I never thought that I would enjoy something like that or that it would bring that much enjoyment, but that's just an example of just so much shifted. It had a domino effect to just try new things, period.
Troy Washington:No. Again, I love it because that's that's exactly what I mean. Like, there is a progression style or a roadblock or a hill or whatever you wanna call it, and it incites you to do something different. Like and when you do something different, you're going to experience life a different way. It just it's it's automatically it's just like being in an argument with somebody.
Troy Washington:If you're if you're elevated emotionally, the argument only goes one way. But whenever you decide to lower your elevation, I guess, or I don't wanna say, you know but people say about what's going on, then the terms in which the interaction is happening is gonna change. And that's how we should be with all things in our life, I feel like, especially when we're being productive. Because I think that's kind of what we're alluding to here when we talk about when progression starts. Like, again, for me in real estate, I have times, again, where I don't know what it's supposed to look like.
Troy Washington:I just don't know because, you know, every real estate deal is different or just being able to procure customers is different just depending on what's going on in life. And, you know, the thing that comes to my mind is I I wanna use my wife as an example. Like, she does not wanna do anything the same over and over again. Right? Like
JClay:Right.
Troy Washington:She won't she won't watch the same show. Like, I I will binge watch the show. I will watch the same show over and over again. Not not me watch the but I'm saying I will binge watch something. Right?
Troy Washington:Yeah. But and you and I assume you're saying you. But, I guess, the beauty of life is when you have these roadblocks, that's a hiccup in the mundane task that you do over the repetitiveness of anything. And so it gives you, again, more opportunity to, be within yourself. And, again, I don't I'm not a person that has a problem with doing anything over and over again the same, but I also do know that there's a such thing as called boredom.
Troy Washington:And whenever boredom kicks in, I'm not necessarily tired of doing the same thing over it's just that used to this. Do I really wanna do it? Right? And so I think that that, again, gives you the opportunity to say, how else can I do this? How can I change my environment?
Troy Washington:You know, how much energy can I bring to it? What else can I add to it in order to make to to to progress at a more, you know, faster rate than what I'm looking for anyway? But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. The, yeah, there there's an opportunity even with the the mundane to to take it to the next level. Like, I I've seen clips of people, like, maybe chopping up some vegetables where they could just do tricks with it and stuff. And it's like the only way to do that is you gotta get comfortable with the basics and then you want to progress. Because, you know, a lot of times when your love isn't there, you do just enough to be good enough to do your purpose.
JClay:And and so, like, it which is interesting to me now now that I'm thinking about it. Like, man, here is so many things I could go to the next level on. But the cool thing is, so I think 2 weeks ago we had a show called something about let's get that money or whatever. So because I'm still in that mode as well, so many opportunities came up like in this in this potential roadblock that I was in. And, like, my mind has just been expanded.
JClay:Like, man, I did not see that before. I didn't even know that that was a viable option. I didn't even know I had this set up already. Like, I I hadn't all I had to do was maybe press play on it or or something. And it's just amazing how the things that we pray for, the the the intentions that we set, the the directions we wanna go, even the perceived roadblock is a step in that direction if we allow it to be.
JClay:And, you know, because sometimes people will be like, wait. Fine. I just give up. I'm not gonna do this no more. I do that, but it's like, fine, god.
JClay:I give up on this particular action that I'm doing for now because you obviously don't want me to do this, but I'm gonna pivot slightly and just, you know, see. And and usually the door is open, and the thing that I pivoted from kinda either took care of itself or, it it was it was meant for me to be revisit later where it could be easier to do.
Troy Washington:So you said two words here. One of them was give up and one of them was pivot. And I know you don't mean give up because pivot is not giving up that mug. It's really just moving that mug to the side for the time being. And the reason why I like that is, again, imagine thinking that I'm going to do something and then telling yourself that you can't do Yeah.
Troy Washington:Like, it it mean and you know it's not true. You know what I'm saying? Like and, again, I think that's a habit. So, again, I know that you don't give up on anything. I know you were just, you know, just talking.
Troy Washington:Oh, go ahead.
JClay:Well, so my definition of give up has changed. Right? So, like, like, give up. Giving up, that it seems like the worst thing. Like, man, you gave up.
JClay:You you are you are giver up or you're a quitter, and that's not the same as quitting. Like, quitting is you you just done never to do it again, but give up. Like, what are you giving it up to? Who are you giving it up to? And it's like, I'm giving it up to the higher power to take care of so that, you know, I don't have to do all that right now.
JClay:And so so to me now, give up is a is a beautiful, positive thing. I'm happy that I give it up to you.
Troy Washington:And I and I and I say this for everybody that's listening. Take on that You know, I I would say take on that definition as well. Because I I figured as much as soon as you started saying it again, you know, that's what it was. But, again, you know, most people don't look at that like that. And I I mean, I just think that that's a good way to look at it.
Troy Washington:Give it up to god or move it aside, and and allow yourself again, we we would not allow ourself time for things to materialize or for things to, when when you plant a seed grow. You know what I'm saying? Like, we feel like we have to have our hands on it at all times in order for us to be progressing. And sometimes things progress when you allow them to harp I mean, harvest or or grow or, you know, you just let them do what they're supposed to do. And sometimes that is let it sit to the side.
Troy Washington:That is let give it up to god and let him, you know, do whatever he needs to do with it. And for whatever reason, there is a negative thought process behind it. For myself, again, even when I talk about real estate and there being a wave or a kind of a routine of how things go, when I'm in that stagnant place, I have to combat the thoughts of things not being good. I have to combat the thought of, things not moving along. And, you know, again, the way that I do that is that I remember that I'm in other areas.
Troy Washington:So what happens is I take all the energy that I'm spending thinking about the negative things that I have, you know, said are happening and and apply that toward the growth of something else. And which in a turn, it allows those other things that I've given up to God to grow or do what they're supposed to do. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. I I was thinking about a couple of things. One with with, when you said you don't allow seeds to grow and how how long it would take if we're watching a seed grow like it. It seemed like it would take forever. But as soon as we let our minds forget about it and come back, it's like, oh, this was quick.
JClay:And so that made me think about, of course, like, being micromanaged. Nope. Like, for some reason, I don't like I don't like people to see me work. I know how crazy that sounds. Like, even when I used to have a corporate job, when nobody was around was around, I would get so much done in the quickest way possible.
JClay:But then when people were around, I just it'd be more like a hangout. And they'd be like, man, how do you do stuff, man? I don't know. I just just get it done. For whatever reason, I I've been like that.
JClay:But then it it made me think, like, in some instances, the does the higher power, does God step away? Like, I'm I'm gonna allow you to grow, come back, you know, when you're ready or something. Because sometimes, you know, we like, why god? Why is this happening? Why aren't you helping me?
JClay:Or whatever. But in some instances, that is the help. Like, just just by by not helping. Because, you know, if you're always helping in a sense, you don't you don't get to rely on your own sense of power. You don't get to believe in yourself.
JClay:You only believe in in the other, even though it's 1 in the same, but it's just a it's a different stance when you do have that that self confidence and self belief.
Troy Washington:I honestly think that's how it is all the time. That's the reason why you have the saying that he might not come when you wanted to, but he always on time. Yeah. Like, if you really just think about what you just said the way that you described it, it's like, on time was when you out. Like, I mean, I mean, if you think about it, like, I'm doing all of this and you're saying why, why, why, why, why, why?
Troy Washington:And then all of a sudden, you stop saying why, and then you just go on about things, and then you figure that mug out. That's how that generally works that I I've witnessed and I've experienced myself. And so, again, there's something I I like the fact that you said how you know, people people say, like, watching paint dry, but you say, like, watching the plant grow. Like, the thought process of just sitting and watching the plant grow would drive you crazy, especially when you know that it's supposed to do something. And then when you think about us, we know that we're sup like, we know when we have a seed of creation, it's supposed to grow.
Troy Washington:Like, we know it's going to, and there only becomes limited belief when we sit and watch it like we're watching a plant grow. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:And and, actually, now that you say that, and I'm thinking about the co collaboration and and all, it's kinda like breathing. Like, you know, you breathe in, you breathe out. Like, you you hold on to stuff, and then you let go what's not needed anymore. And I found I find that I'm the happiest when I I figured out. I do what I need to do or I do all I can, and then I give it up for the day.
JClay:And it's like, okay. Move on to the next thing or to you know, I'm I'm I'm letting this go. I'm giving this up to to do what it does, and then I revisit it at a later time. And it and it's almost like I'm I'm inspired with new ideas, which I wouldn't had if I just kept hammering it out, hammering it out nonstop, not allowing me to grow and it to grow at the same time.
Troy Washington:Oh, the the thing that I love to do more than anything is write songs. Right? Like but the craziest I've been is when I don't have the thought for that song, and I just sit and listen to the beat over and over again. Like, it it it it's the thing that sets me it puts me in the space that I never wanna be in. You know what I'm saying?
Troy Washington:And, again, I and I use that because it's something that I love, and it's and I I try to, I guess, make the correlation between us and the people listening and also other things that we decide to do that we do micromanage in a sense when it's not necessary. It's one of the things that I always I always appreciated about you that I was never able to master the way that I wanted to was being able to work on multiple songs at a time. Like, you knew when you were at your breaking point, and you knew that creativity could go somewhere else. But,
JClay:you know, like
Troy Washington:I was saying earlier, when I whenever something is, when there's a progress stalling somewhere, you will say that you will live in that negative process of it and not move on to something else. But the moment when you decide to, and, again, I've I've done it. It's just that it's not my my favorite thing to do. But when I've been able to just go on to the next beat and write something else, I was like, oh, I'm just gonna do this song now. And I I literally would just forget about that song, But the creativity was there because I allowed myself to grow outside of the the pot that I was in.
Troy Washington:But go ahead.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. The the thing about that with with me and and, like, writing multiple songs. So okay. One thing I'm fascinated by is let's say I have a deadline on the song deadline on the song, and I was already stalled.
JClay:I find a way to get past that and and and make it so I meet the deadline. Now I don't know if it'd be better if I I would've waited or not, but the cool thing about pivoting to the next song or pivoting to something else is my intention is always to get the best out of me for this particular song. And sometimes my vibration or my mood might not match that of the song. And so it's better to revisit when I'm like, oh, yeah. I can I can speak about this right now versus, you know, forcing myself to?
JClay:But also, it's like I'm it's like I get to collab with another great artist from a different point, which which is me. Like like, if I forgot about a song and I realized it wasn't finished and I hear it, I'm like, this is a may I wrote that? What? And to to be able to then collab with this person because now I have new ideas because I'm I'm a new person at this point. I have different perspectives on things, and it's it it makes it a more complete package.
JClay:And so, like, for for all creatives, like, I I all those that that create, I would definitely say collab with yourself in that way. Like, revisit projects you've never finished, and don't be afraid to put down that project when you get stalled and and come back because then because the best thing, you get to create with one of the greatest artists ever, which is yourself.
Troy Washington:So I I like something that, you said, and I I would say it like this. Understanding where your energy is, knowing where you're in like, knowing where you're the most enthusiastic, because I think that's important. Yeah. Because there is something about when you style some area and going to something that you feel like is a filler. And I think that's important to understand as well versus you really digging deep within yourself and realizing what else you want to do.
Troy Washington:Because there are things that, like, again, right now that I do not want to do or I might be stalled at, and And there are other things that I can put in to fill the gap, but I don't wanna do those either.
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:And I think that when you were, just describing, like, going to the next song, and you just like, oh, I know I can I can wreck this? Like, you there's a feeling that kinda comes along with it. And I I think that, so so so a couple things here. Knowing where your energy is, think that you cannot spread yourself too thin. Right?
Troy Washington:And and, not being afraid to apply the energy where the energy actually is despite whatever the outside factors might be telling you. Because sometimes, you can feel like your energy should be going to something, but there are a lot of things you that's telling you don't do that right now. It could be people. It could be circumstances. It could be, others' energy.
Troy Washington:Just it's just a a bunch of different things that could play a role in it. So I think that, you know, just not being afraid, is important too. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and and when you say that about spreading yourself too thin, I used to actually be afraid of that, in a lot of instances because it's like, man, I can only do so many things at once, which is true. You can only do so many things at once. But there've been so many things I've been able to lend a hand to just because I was excited even for something someone else was doing, and I knew I could help them with that that it was more exciting than what I was working on. But that doesn't mean I forgot about the project I was working on.
JClay:That doesn't mean that I didn't revisit it. But that energy match was for a reason because I can honestly say it led to a lot of things. And it it doesn't have to be like opportunities. It could just lead to realizations from within that is like, man, I'm glad I got to experience that. And I wouldn't had I not followed that flow of of energy where it was thought out in one spot, but it was greater in this other spot.
JClay:And it's it's it's a beautiful thing when you just I don't know. Will you will you just flop following that flow? And and with that, like, I have a lot of projects I'm working on right now, like, a lot at different stages, some even almost complete. But even in those states, sometimes, like I said, that that energy is heightened in other areas. Follow that.
JClay:You can't go wrong.
Troy Washington:You know, I think about my kids in this instance when we talk about this because, specifically, Brody, because he younger, and he doesn't have what I would say is that stuck focus. And what I mean by that is what we're talking about, where we we we get to doing things, and then we'll stall out, and then we'll lose progress on the stall out because we don't wanna move on. But I think about him, you know, and they say be childlike. Like, Brody will stop anything in a dime and go do something else. Like, that's what he wanted to do all the time.
Troy Washington:And, you know, again, just as an example and and and I'm always puzzled by it too. That's what's funny about it. So he'll he'll be playing on his chin, and he'll be in the middle of a Madden game, like, middle of it, like, 2nd quarter. And then he'll just stop the game, and he'll just jump on 2 k, and then he'll play 2 k, play maybe 3 quarter. Then he'll just stop.
Troy Washington:And I'm like, right, he don't wanna finish any of this, then he'll go back and he'll play FIFA. And then he'll stop and he'll come into the living room and talk to me, then let me tell you about the score on this game. And he'll tell me the scores on each game that he haven't finished yet. In some kind of way, he can always go back and finish them, but he literally, and he's he's having the time of his life living all these different worlds all at the same time. Then he'll just all of a sudden stop and just start playing basketball in his room and play a a full of that game.
Troy Washington:And then last night ended up camp coming in the living room with me and was like, let's watch a movie. In the middle of his basketball game, watched the movie with me, fell asleep. And, again, he did anything. He didn't but he was in a, a place of happiness and joy the entire time while I was in a place of confusion, looking at him, trying to say, how are you being fulfilled when you never complete or have a complete thought? And, again, this goes back to your thought of about spreading yourself too thin.
Troy Washington:He has no thoughts of spreading his self too thin because he's not married to any specific thing at that moment. And the only he's married to is him having fun or him being joyous. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and that's a beautiful thing because, like, when you're when you're so focused on where you're at now, you have no time to even dwell on where you haven't been. And and you're you're really trusting because you're like, you don't think nothing ever like, yeah, it's it's gonna be there when I come back. And if it's not, who cares? Because I'm doing this now.
JClay:I'm engaged with this now. I'm experiencing this right now. And we often get caught up in the what what should I say, like, the the describing things and and classifying things that we miss the thing itself. Like, I I've I've watched stuff or I've seen, like, articles and stuff about how people write music and how you should approach it and everything. And and to me, it's like, man, you you losing it if you try to if you try to go in this formula.
JClay:Yes. It could work. Yes. It could. But it's it for me.
JClay:It's a free creative form. Like, you can create a different way than you did before. You can make a completely different song than you did before. You don't have to follow any standard at all. You can you can write before you have the music.
JClay:You can have the music first. You can freestyle it. You can like, it it it's just so many ways to go about it that when we try to classify how to do something, it it you lessen it in a way.
Troy Washington:So to that point, like, it says we're saying what do when progress stalls up, but that is one of the reasons why progress generally stalls out because of that fear. Like, I don't have to have all the answers, man. Like, having all the answers is what stop majority of business people from being successful. Like, period. You know, it look.
Troy Washington:Well, I just got my license to get to be an originator. Well, I haven't got the I actually passed the test. But a a big part of me not going to take the test was fear of failing, number 1, and then me thinking about when I get the license, what I'm gonna do. And then I had to ask myself, what does it matter? Like, does it even matter?
Troy Washington:Why don't I just get it and then see where it takes me? It's the same thing about me going and, you know, becoming a substitute. One of the most thing that I've had happen now, bro, was being in the classroom with the kids, And I didn't know what it looked like. I tried to frame what it was gonna be. Like, I tried to think about how I was gonna act, but the is I've been in the school, and it's just been a cool thing.
Troy Washington:You know what I mean? And, the the reason why I pointed out all of these different things out is because just like Brody, my life is full. I'm not trying to have the answer to everything, or I'm not trying to understand the ending outcome to everything. And so because of that, have the room for the stalling because I'm just moving along and experiencing life the way that it's supposed to be experienced. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. I I I love that. And and what came to mind is somehow we we get caught up in right and wrong, like like, the wrong way to do stuff. I've heard a lot of people, like, they're like, how do you do this? Because I don't wanna mess up.
JClay:I don't wanna do this wrong. I don't wanna do it wrong. I never did this before. But it's like, you you can't do it wrong. Like, it's even if you did, you can correct it.
JClay:Like, everything is correctable. And don't let that stop you. But also, I've I've been victim to that as well, though. It's like I got all these options. I don't want to I don't want to do it wrong.
JClay:I don't want to mess it up. And it's kinda like when did that idea come into play? Like, when you brought up your your son, some people may think you once you play a game, you have to play the full game before you can stop playing. And it's like somebody may have told it told one of us when we were his age, you're playing wrong. It's like I'm playing wrong.
JClay:There's a right way to play. And then we we get blocked by all this other stuff. So it's it's interesting to see why we accepted that belief and what led to it, because it is it it's really not needed. Like like, again, to your point, you didn't know where the substitute teaching would take you. How could you know?
JClay:But you did it anyway. It was like, well, let's do it. If I don't wanna do it, I don't have to do it anymore, but let's do it. Oh, I like doing this. I will keep doing this, and it's that simple.
Troy Washington:Bro, it's funny, though, because when I think about again, you can use substitute teaching. You can teach I mean, you can say grill like, the very first time I started grill and, again, I'm not I'm saying I'm not saying that I'm a professional griller either or grill master. I'm just a good enough grill master for myself, which is the most important thing. But it it was the same thing. You know, one day, I just went to Walmart and I got a grill.
Troy Washington:I I never did it before, and then I told Sharnell, like, we just gonna barbecue. And then I probably barbecued every week for probably about 3 months just because I was so excited. Like, it was so much energy behind it because I was having so much fun finding out something new. And, again, when I think about the rest of my life at that time, it's not that everything else, stopped. I didn't put all the emphasis on all the other things in my life because something else had the energy, had the enthusiasm.
Troy Washington:And the the beautiful part about it is when I went back to all the other things that I was doing, the amount of focus that I would've had on stagnation was not there. Because as an example, I was working a job, and I was going a job, and I was talking to people about barbecuing. And so now if you just look at the dynamic of my life, like, I'm doing this, not being bothered by whatever might have been stagnant about it, and I'm bringing in the rest of my world. So I grew my world. And, you know, I I think that, again, that's why I think following the energy is important whenever you do feel like you're stalled out because you don't do anything but expand what your world consists of.
Troy Washington:But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And what I love about that is I wanna say I've been around you where people have asked you about grilling as if you were an expert, whereas you just said, like, you just did it on a whim one day, and you did and and and what's cool is you have become an expert. And but at the same time, I mean, there's always more that you can learn, But it just goes to show when you have that energy for something, people are gonna wanna hear your tips. People wanna get know what you're doing. Like, same thing.
JClay:I even reached out to to a to a friend of mine about gardening because I've seen his videos of gardening, and I've always wanted to do it. I just didn't have the the the level of energy at that time. But the level of energy of me starting is is is still there, though. It has it has not waned. It just has not been more than the other thing.
JClay:But I said it to say that anything you have enthusiasm for, if you follow it, people will start asking you the questions versus you asking all the questions before following it, if that makes sense.
Troy Washington:No. It may it makes a 100% sense. And then I I had to get a side note on here and tell you, grow something.
JClay:Yeah. I mean, I I have I have grown something. I I I just I want the I want the backyard filled with some stuff, and I'm
Troy Washington:I'm just I I I no. I feel you, though. Because, again, it's to the point, like, number 1, when did you ever have time to do all this? You always had time to do all that. I'm talking about myself too.
Troy Washington:Right? Yeah. Like, when did we ever have time? And this this is kinda goes back to answer the question what to do when progress stalls. What you've been thinking you should've been doing the whole time.
Troy Washington:Yeah. Because, again, we we're we're living a life where experiences is everything. Like, it it literally it is every time you experience something new, bro, there's a certain amount of love that kinda comes with that much. And that's it. That's even it look.
Troy Washington:And the reason why we we over and I I don't mean this truly overdue, but this is the reason why we things or we do things in excess because we're in love for the moment. And it doesn't it it's not the it doesn't have to be what is described as the biggest things. Like, there's a time where I figured out how to boil eggs, and then I boiled eggs for everybody in the house for weeks. Right? There was a time, like, for breakfast, I would just fix the boiled area.
Troy Washington:Who won't boil eggs? You know what I mean? And there was a level of joy that kinda just came with them. Like, I got boiled eggs today. Right?
Troy Washington:Then there's a a a day when I learned how to cook chicken oil, when I grew a plant, or, when I when I figured out how to shoot with my kids. Like, oh, we gotta go out there today. And there's a there's a level of enthusiasm experience new. Just like going to a restaurant for the first time and eating that one dish and you're like, oh, they was in. So every single time I go there, I'm gonna get that, or I'm gonna I'm going to get outside of myself and say, I want this today just because I want this thing.
Troy Washington:And so, like, the progress stalls. What you've been thinking that you can't do or that you don't have enough time to do or that you feel like it's gonna take too much in order for you to do it, you just have to do. You just have to get that experience because you don't realize the doors that you're about to open up for yourself. But go ahead, Jay. Yeah.
JClay:But so this is this is the tight thing about what you said. So first, this particular week, like, I I go, okay. If I have an idea of something to do, even if I can't do it, I just put it on my to do list, and I like, I don't assign a date. And so I never really go back to check that. And this week, I was just going just checking off items.
JClay:I was like, well, might as well just do this. Just might as well do this. So I was I was doing it. And also, I didn't realize how much time I actually had when I imposed those social media limits on myself. Man, I got a lot of time.
JClay:Yeah. So so I say this to say that I'm with you. Like like like when you think about it, it doesn't really take that much time to to plant a seed. Like you just that's really that's really it. And then you get to then then when you when you go work on everything else you wanna work, you could just come back and and look at it and just see, oh, okay.
JClay:It it sprouted or it didn't sprout or it grew or it didn't grew. But it it really takes a moment in time. So I'm with you. This week is on.
Troy Washington:Yeah. And and and, again, you know, I and and so you're saying that, but I'm saying that back to myself. Yeah. And the reason why I'm saying it back to myself is because even as we're going through it, when I'm giving the examples, bro, like, I how much and love these moments make me be with myself. Like, it you know, from working out to cooking to growing something to, you know, just doing perfect mode.
Troy Washington:Like, the experiences are everything. And, again, we like to limit ourselves because we have truly defined all the ins and out of every single experience that we're gonna have. So when I do when I grow this plant, it's going to it's gonna grow in 4 days. It's gonna do this. It's gonna do the I I know exactly what it's gonna look like, but I don't know what it's gonna look like.
Troy Washington:Do you know what I'm saying? And so the thrill of life is finding that app. You know what I mean? Just like the reason why we get so caught up in shows because when a show ends, we wanna know what was gonna happen next because we don't know. It's the don't know that's important or the the experience or or or just actually going through it.
Troy Washington:And I think that when you style out, you've spent too much time knowing what you don't know. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. I I I love that. And what's what's funny is so, you know, I said I I tweaked my back. Right? And it it caused a a domino effect of me shifting.
JClay:The funny thing is I actually thought that I would tweak my back earlier than that. Like, even with the, you know, the expectations and things because if I if I allow history to be my teacher, the things that I was doing, I was going hard on. Usually when I go hard too fast on it, like too hard, my back, like, nah, we weren't ready for that. We weren't strengthened for that. We chill we need to chill for a while.
JClay:But when that didn't happen, I was like, oh, yes, sir. I'm going extra hard and just doing it like that. So it it was probably even needed from that standpoint to a stall out from my body to just rest and and for me to pay attention to these other things as well. So it's it's almost like you can't go wrong like a a roadblock. It is there for a reason.
JClay:It's it's a gift. It's an answer to a prayer if you allow it to be, and not get caught up in the energy, like you said, that I've been caught up in before. Like, why? I've been trying hard. This I'm I'm focusing on this.
JClay:I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. Like, right, which is why this roadblock happened so that you can continue that in other ways.
Troy Washington:So I I man, I had to say, I you hit this mug when you said, like, the question is, how can you go wrong when you're doing something for yourself? You know? And and, again, that that's what makes me think about Brody. And you hit that mug when you say it, where down the line somebody told one of us that when you play this game, you have to complete this game. When you do this this certain way, it has to be this certain way.
Troy Washington:But Brody actually does operate in the mindset. How can I be doing anything wrong if I'm doing it for myself? So I don't have to finish the game because I'm gonna have fun with the next game, period. The other thing that he he he he did that I used to mess with him about, I used to give him a hard time about it. But he still does it because I just left him alone because it was just like he's in his own world.
Troy Washington:But he would play these with 2 remotes. Like, he would play both sides. Like, he's gonna play with this team. He plays single sometimes, but he'll play with both remotes. Right?
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:And I'd be like, bruh, like, you it's not a real game. You're not even playing. But but, again, this is the programming that you're talking about. And somewhere down the line, somebody told me it's not a real game unless you're playing against somebody real. Now this is what's funny about this whole scenario that I'm using Brody as an example.
Troy Washington:He plays 2 k with 2 remotes. But whenever I play him now, I can't beat him. And it's probably not gonna be many people. I mean, he can lose probably the, you know, t t that plays as much as him against other people. But if you're a casual player that just knows how to play Yeah.
Troy Washington:You're probably not gonna beat him in 2 k, and that's him playing with himself all the time. And, again, there are imposed limits that I have in my mind that says, well, if you never play with nobody else, you're not gonna ever be better than anybody. But that's not real, and that's only because he's operating in what we're talking about. When progress stalls, I don't have anybody to play with. What are you gonna do?
Troy Washington:Well, I just play with myself because that's what I wanna do any anyway. And so it comes back to the question that I asked. Make ever do wrong when you're doing for yourself. When it can be when can it be the wrong move? But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. And and and that's the that's the cool thing with, like, generations, because each generation, whether they realize it or not, were indoctrinated with a certain amount of rules. And as the new generations come in, they they see the absurdity in it, which we might not have saw the absurdity in it, just like the same with our parents and and so on back. Like, we all saw the absurdity in what our parents did and were able to do things the other way.
JClay:And I I can see it I see it a lot with the with the next generation too. Like, they're like, yeah, this y'all do this. This is crazy. We we gonna do this. And it's like, man, you you're right.
JClay:And that's part of that too, of get getting stalled because sometimes we'll get started to our own detriment being caught up in a mindset of a time that's no longer or of of this. Like, I guess an example is, you hear basketball players, you know, not not bad, but people who critique basketball, like, yeah, all this friendship stuff and players, you know, like, they they didn't talk to no other players. They weren't about that, which is cool. I mean, I understand that that too, because, yeah, that that is what it is. But it's it's different now.
JClay:Like and there's so many ways. You don't you don't have to go around having enemies anymore if you don't want to. You don't have to go around being miserable at your job if you don't have to be towards certain amount of people. And it's just it's just cool to allow yourself to be renewed in the new energy. Even even I'll say this.
JClay:I was talking to my wife last night, and we were just talking about even, like, with fashion, how, how, like, on the basketball court, you could sometimes easily tell ages by the short length, the length of their shorts and the length of their socks. Just because, again, each generation does it differently. And I was just saying how there was a point, you know, I was in the baggy area era when I was like, there's no way I'm wearing fitted jeans or skinny jeans. Like, that's impossible. But one day, it just looked right, and the baggy no longer looked right because I allowed myself to just be in the flow of new energy.
JClay:And and, again, I don't know when the switch happened, but it it just happened. And but I know some people who still like, nah. I'm forever going to be wearing this baggy and and and like that. And not that there's anything wrong with it, but it's just something to be set up.
Troy Washington:Now the reason why I laugh is because I remember I don't remember when the switch happened for me, but I remember when the switch happened. And then I also remember me trying to go back to something baggy, but it didn't look right to me. It it was like it would just shut off. Right? Yeah.
Troy Washington:But to your point, and I want to elaborate on this, when you were talking about about being renewed, the part that we have to all understand is that we're always renewed. That is the for the stagnation. It gives you an opportunity to realize what the truth is. The truth is you're renewed. Like, you're stagnant here because something else can be elaborated upon.
Troy Washington:Like, your energy was waning here. So we put this in front of you for the food energy for you to spark something else. And and what's gonna happen is that's going to come back up. Just talking about you and me as an example, you know, businesses that we have. And this is the reason why I don't have I mean, you have this all the time.
Troy Washington:We we we talk about, well, I'm working on this, but, you know, I ain't gonna put too much energy on this mug right now. And either if you say it or I said, I'm a be like, well, you know, I'm not tripping because I know it's supposed it's going to be what it's supposed to be when it's supposed to be. And I think that giving ourself that leeway just like Brody playing the game, this thing out of it, he, again, he's better at the game than I am, which he's in my mind, he shouldn't be. And and the reason why I pointed out is because I believe that you allowing yourself to be renewed in other areas is gonna make this thing that we have we we're defining as stagnant or stalled be better than it was going to be in the first place because you are allowing the energy flow to flow the way that it's supposed to. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. I I love that you said that, about being that you're always being renewed, and that's true. And and we we we try to stop the process for whatever reason. Like, we're we're scared or something. We think our word is gonna end.
JClay:We really try to stop the process, and we think it's the worst thing in the world if things aren't going according to how we thought they should go. Not even allowing the the the other viewpoint to maybe seep in or or just a new way to seep in. And it could it will lead to you being miserable over time because you're just blocking, blocking, blocking. But if you allow that renewal, like you said, because it's always happening in so many ways, it it it will lead to life being more beauty be recognized as more beautiful.
Troy Washington:And and I will say this about that as well. It'll you're first of all, I've talked about this cooking eggs, barbecuing, growing stuff, you know, coaching kids, teaching them how to shoot, being in the school, and there's a certain level of energy if you're around me today. I talk about these things that you're gonna see. It's gonna be like there's gonna be excitement about all these things because these are renew renewable resources that were always available to me that I just chose to tap into because something may have been stagnant. So I agree with you.
Troy Washington:And, again, that's just the amount of love that you have for your allow your energy to renew and be experienced. But the the other piece to this is other people will recognize it as well. And funny enough, I, you know, I just I literally was just with my dad probably about 2 weeks ago, and he said something to me about myself that I didn't even necessarily even, pick up on. Now, again, I'm telling you that I'm always being renewed because I'm allowing myself. But I told him, I was like, hey.
Troy Washington:You know, I'm gonna get my loan officer license this week. I'm gonna go take my test. This was the week before my test. I'm gonna go take my test. And from there, then I'm gonna see, you know, what happens from that point.
Troy Washington:And that's kinda how I push that money. And he's like, man, I was just telling somebody about you. This is what the worst Like, you're always reinventing yourself every 5 years. There's always something new that you're adding to it. Now mind you, I'd I'm always growing, but I didn't know that there was any time frequency that anybody else can notice.
Troy Washington:Now, again, I feel like I do it more than that, but, again, it's still not something that I think that anybody is witnessing. And the reality of it, it it is, again, a part of our makeup is, we are drawn by the energy of what we feel like people think of us or what people are doing. Like, it's just it's just it's natural. You can get outside of it, but we do love and relish the idea of people seeing us grow. And so if that's if that means anything to you, you allowing yourself to renew your energy is another spark plug because people are going to witness it as well and give you the feedback that you are drawn to whenever you are doing these things.
Troy Washington:But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:And to that point too, like, if you're the type that would allow people to grow around you, it would lead to more pleasant experience as well than more people wanting to be around you. Because because I I've been around people who want to keep you in a box, and they they might not do it intentionally. They might not even know that they're doing it, so I wouldn't fault them for that. But I I but I know I do have relationships where we allow each other to grow. We don't we don't keep each other, and you always you only did this.
JClay:You're supposed to always do this. You're supposed to always be this and and never go beyond it. And then the the second thing I want to point out was when you talked about the eggs and you you got you were happy just boiling eggs. Like, the energy that you brought to this now, I can only imagine in your household so much so that I don't eat eggs, but I would be like, hey, I wanna boil an egg just from your energy. And it goes to show that when we follow our energy, it's contagious in a beautiful way.
JClay:So yeah.
Troy Washington:No. No. To that point, though. Like, my kids was waking up in the morning, crunk, like, we getting eggs today. Like, they they were really happy about that much.
Troy Washington:And then it it it in turn made me happy too because it was something that we all kinda had in common for those few weeks where the energy was flowing for that. And to your oh, go ahead. Go ahead.
JClay:Well, I I just say on the egg, but it it just goes to show how how simple joy can be. Like like, if anybody can boil an egg, but it it but your energy is like, man, let's boil some eggs, but go ahead. Yeah.
Troy Washington:And and and I also want to touch on your point about, people wanting to keep you in that box. Right? So so it's 2 things here. You being the person that allows people to grow or, you know, experience new things or, renew their energy and give them the right kind of energy, behind it. But the other part to people not people holding you into a box.
Troy Washington:And the only reason I say this is because I I want you to recognize yourself, and I'm talking to everybody because this is something that I had to do. You have to be able to recognize yourself in it. Sometimes people hold you in a box because you're holding yourself in a box too, and you don't realize that you're holding yourself in a box. And I I and and, again, the reason why I know this is because I was I have my friends have been my friends since we were in middle school, and my friends have held me in boxes that I've held myself in, not purposely, but just based off of actions because of the thing that I said earlier. We're wanting specific fee from people.
Troy Washington:And, again, you might do the You froze a bit on me. Right. There you go. You you'll probably do this unconsciously. Right?
Troy Washington:And, like, you're seeking feedback. And the the feedback that I was always getting was I always wanted my friends to know that no matter what, I was down for them. And so that mean if somebody wanted to fight, Troy was gonna be there. So there was a bravado that I kinda walked around with all the time, again, unconsciously. I didn't realize that I was doing it, but I wanted them them to know that no matter what, if it go down, I'm down.
Troy Washington:I'm I'm boxing. Right? So what happened is my friends looked at me like the person that he's gonna be about their life, and that was my boss. But that's what I was portraying. Again, I wanted to say and, again, I was about other things.
Troy Washington:I was about going out to have fun, go holler at girls, all of that kind of stuff. But the thing that was at top of my heart at all times when I was with them is, well, I'm let you you know I'm down. And so that box, they put me there.
JClay:They was like, okay.
Troy Washington:If something go down, we gonna hit up Troy. If this popping up, we gonna hit up Troy. And then in my mind, I'm thinking to myself, like, why y'all always hit me for this stuff? You know what I mean? But the reality of it was the bravado that I led with gave them that.
Troy Washington:And then when I realized it and I changed it, the box disappeared. They looked for me for other things. They looked for me for different stuff that I wanted them to because I was able to project exactly what I wanted out of my life, and they could see that. But go ahead, Dave.
JClay:Yeah. I love that. And and it's a good reminder too, like, to make sure we're not the ones holding ourselves in this box. Because, again, people will only treat us how we allow them to treat us. Even well, yeah.
JClay:Yeah. I I I'll just say it like that. But we are getting close to the end. So I I do I just to wrap it up and just to to reiterate some things, there's no stalling out. When progress stalls, it's part of the progress continuing just in another area.
JClay:It this this needs to go on on its own for a little while. It doesn't need your constant attention. And when you trust that, progress will never stall, and you can go from thing to thing to thing or item or item or filling to filling of of good filling of of joy, and it can be the most beautiful thing ever. But
Troy Washington:yeah. Go ahead. Yep. So, you know, just following behind, Jay, I would just say always realize that you're renewed no matter what. I always realize that you're renewed.
Troy Washington:And and I guess the best way to convey that is whenever you're doing something, whether it's for a business, for yourself, or someone else, and you feel stagnant or you feel like there's nowhere else to go, just look deep within and realize what else there is to do, but it doesn't necessarily have to pertain to what you were doing. It will come back to you in its proper time, and it's gonna come back bigger, better, or greater than you could have ever imagined because you allowed the flow of energy. Sometimes that thing that you're gonna do is gonna give you the idea that you needed for what you were doing. And so you have to allow, you have to allow you to be as great as you are, and that sometimes means expanding yourself outside of where you think that you are. So, you know, outside of that, I just wanna let y'all know that we're grateful for y'all being here.
Troy Washington:Without y'all, we wouldn't be here. We'd definitely be doing something, but we wouldn't be here. And just to remember, just to always always be renewed and that you can take us out, my guy.
JClay:Yeah. Appreciate y'all. If you found this helpful, that like button, share, subscribe. Consider hitting the donation on the the link that is there of the Patreon. And, yeah, man, just remember, you're a perfect creation made by a perfect creator, so you might as well accept your perfection and enter perfect
Troy Washington:mode. Shame.
JClay:If I reminded you that you are perfect, would you argue me down or step into your perfection? Welcome to perfect welcome to perfect where there are no excuses, no expectations, and we explore the world without limitations. I'm Jay Clay, rapper, and spiritual teacher, with my co host Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor. Let's be real. So let's be perfect.
JClay:Everything. Anything. Anything. Anything. Anything.
JClay:Anything. Anything. Perfect. Everything. Anything.
JClay:Anything. Anything. Perfect. Everything. Anything.
JClay:Anything. Anything. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect.
